So ladies and gentlemen, lemme present Bowser's own kids
Larry Koopa
Being one of the youngest of the Koopalings, this little Cheatsy is known to be a sports freak. His favorite sports include Tennis, Football, and Dodge Ball, but only when he's making everyone dodge Spiked Iron Balls and Copies of Rush Limbaugh's Music Album. Larry is also known to cheat his other siblings of their allowance. In one scenario, he cheated Roy out of his allowance so bad, that Roy decided to give him a swirly over a lake full of Jelectros. How shocking.
Larry Koopa is one of many Koopalings that I am talking about. But since he was the first, we decided to cover this guy. He's most likely to get a job in Wall Street, Mushroom Kingdom.
Morton Koopa Jr
Jr? So who was Morton Koopa Sr? Bowser's long lost brother? Anyway, this Big Mouth sure lives up to his name, mainly because he must have had one too many fish hooks in his mouth. Unlike his siblings, he has brown scales, while his siblings have tan scales. He happens to be one of the heaviest of Koopalings, despite being younger than most of em. Maybe its because he's known to stuffing himself full of food to bulk up. I mean even Roy and Lugwig couldn't eat that much.
In terms of future, I see Morton Koopa Jr being the Mushroom Kingdom variation of Glenn Beck. Why with his jibba jabba, Morton is sure to rile up some Mushroom citizens to craziness.
Wendy O'Koopa
Bowser's little Princess all villains would love and all soccer moms would fear. This little Kootie Pie wants everything. If she likes it, she wants it. If anyone got in her way, tough noogies. If she didn't get anything her way, she would throw a tantrum, and big time. Even King Bowser wouldn't dare make this little devil cry. I mean take a look at Iggy. He broke one of Wendy's favorite toys and she gave him 2 black eyes.
Since she's also said to be a great singer, Wendy, I suggest becoming more popular than Britney Spears in the future. Not to mention about as bratty.
Iggy Koopa
Wait. You mean to tell me those are glasses? They look more like black eyes to me. Anyway, this koopaling can Hop to the beat when it comes to designing mechanicals. His genius is second to his older brother Lugwig Von Koopa. But he mainly likes to use his inventions to pull nasty pranks on others. In fact, I have a recording where Mario got a prank call from Iggy Koopa(And unfortunately, I am unable to play it thanks to a certain Mushroom Princess).
Iggy Koopa, you may be a genius, but I recommend a better job for you: Shock Jock. You can learn alot from Howard Stern and his krew.
Roy Koopa
Talk about big brute. This Bully lives up to being one. He likes to beat anyone(Or even his siblings) just for the heck of it. When he hits the deck, the whole floor shake, causing earthquakes. Oddly enough, he seems to be obsessed with the color pink. Pink head, Pink Shades, and he once had a Pink Shell. Yeah, a little girly man. The only time he got a beatdown was when his obsession with pink went too far when he tried to swipe Wendy's favorite hair ribbon.
Roy, might I suggest getting a job at the Club Flower as a Bouncer? That was you can beat the snot out of anyone who tries to get in that doesn't belong.
Lemmy Koopa
Take alook at that. Rainbow colored hair. Mohawk. Ponytail. That looks very Hip. Despite his look, Lemmy has the personality of a little child. I mean, he balances himself on that beach ball. And Despite his age, he's the smallest of the Koopalings. Also, he's one of the dumbest, as his child-like act means clumsiness. In one incident, he accidentally threw a beach ball at his sister when trying to aim for Mario. That may be the reason why Wendy got those oversized lips.
Lemmy, I'm sorry to say this, but there's only one job for you: The Circus. Why? Because you're nothing more than a circus freak of a Koopaling
Ludwig Von Koopa
Ladies and Gentlemen, the Brains of the Koopa Klan. This Kooky Koopaling, being the oldest, is also the most talented of them all. It is said that his IQ exceeds even his youngest brother Iggy. He also has a thing for classical music. It is said that he was the one who constructed the airships of the Koopa Fleet, along with the Tanks and Battleships. Most likely all that time playing Warcraft 2 and 3 and Starcraft paid off for him. Well till Bowser Jr came along
Ludwig Von Koopa, I salute you, and what better job for you is none other than President of the Mushroom Kingdom.
Bowser Jr.
Last, but not least, the newest member of the family. Bowser Jr is pretty much like his own father. His loyalty to his father remains pure as his attitude. Snobby, bratty, and a complete troublemaker. He's also the only one of Bowser's kids to have partake in sports games, from Baseball, to Basketball, to Kart Racing, Soccer, and Hedgehog chasing. Rumor has it his father is working alongside an Eggman.
If I would recommend a job for this kid, it would be tax collector. But since he's Bowser's favorite, no doubt Bowser Jr would be the future king of the Koopas.
And there you have it. Bowser's 8 kids. Cute, cuddly, and just wanting to maim you. But the question is...who is their mother?*Me thinks its Princess Peach* Someday, we'll find out.
Works cited on images: Mario Wiki
No comments:
Post a Comment