Happy new Year, and all that

Welcome to 2010. If anything, this may be the year that gaming comes out of the dark age and cleanses itself of casual gamers.....or rather the fratcore that continues to buy games like Halo ODST and Modern Warfare 2.

However, it seems Hardcore gaming was on the attack back in October of 2009 when Escapist Magazine member and Zero Punctuation reviewer Yahtzee was hideously attacked by Electronic Arts in a scheme worse than Mirror's Edge

It seemed pretty obvious that the wooden box addressed to Yahtzee had something to do with Dante's Inferno, given that the inside of the lid read "The Fifth Circle of Hell Is Close." Members of The Escapist staff crowded around the box, eager to find out what was inside. We were somewhat bemused to discover nothing but a small burlap bundle containing safety goggles and a ball peen hammer.

Then the music began, and it all became horrifically clear.

"Never Gonna Give You Up..."

What have you done, Electronic Arts? You dare poison Yahtzee with filth sung by Rick Astley? Surely you crossed the line there. But it doesn't end there. Oh no. The troubles continue after the Rickrolling occured.

Strapping on the goggles (he is nothing if not conscientious about safety), he set about smashing the box. He had to break through three layers of wood, bones, and insects, but he finally got to the sound box's guts and yanked out one of the batteries. He also found a small scroll that had been tucked into the musical workings, which read:

The sin of wrath is yours. You have succumbed to anger and opened an infernal spring that seethes with dark waters. Quelled not, your anger begot rage. The waters have risen unchecked and ye will be drowned in stinking mire.

Go to Hell.

There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. Further proof that Electronic Arts is really the devil inside trying to lure poor Yahtzee to the dark side of gaming like New Super Mario Bros Wii, Castle Crashers, Uncharted 2, Halo 3 and a deck of cards. How dare they use a form of humorous advertisement to scare poor, poor Yahtzee. Now will you excuse me, I must write a letter to Yahtzee to give him encouragement to stand up to the evilicious Electronic Arts. Yahtzee, if you're there, please write a video blog and slam Electronic Arts if it makes you feel better, even at the expense of people laughing at you.

Works Cited: Escapist Magazine