Extra Life/Game Over: Coming down on coming down on the Wii

Folks, I sense some disappointment in the air and it's the Wii. Ether that or it was that 3 bean salad I had for lunch yesterday. This is a special edition of Extra Life/Game Over. And it's not a very happy one.

First off, a Game Over to IGN. Weeks ago, IGN posted an article on "Why Nintendo is Lazy," and then they posted an article comparing New Super Mario Bros Wii to Splosion Man. Now it seems they have flip flopped and begun praising the Wii for "Embracing a Legacy." The topic: A new NBA Jam for Wii by Electronic Arts.

With NBA Jam, Electronic Arts is attempting something that seems to be a slowly building trend on the Nintendo Wii: once hardcore, classic franchises are being brought back as fresh, new productions that advance the property without straying far beyond the classic mechanics. It has a multi-tier effect -- developers stick to the strengths of the console's hardware, mainstream gamers gain current-generation pick-up-and-play software, and hardcore gamers have something both familiar and exclusive on the Wii console.

But that destroys the concept of why we hate the Wii. We were suppose to bash it because it was made for non-gamers. Not praise it for updating an old classic like how New Super Mario Bros Wii, Punch-Out and A Boy and his Blob do so.

It's a strategy that could work to the system's favor. While the more powerful systems fight it out with aggressive Mature-focused, high-budget productions that push visuals in the HD era, the less-capable Wii can appeal to the clearly segmented "casual" and "hardcore" markets with familiar, straightforward experiences that bring them up to 2010 standards that gamers can accept. Tried-and-true, challenging game designs with mechanics can be reborn with new presentations that don't overwhelm the "new audience" that Nintendo is attracting. While doing this, it's approaching mechanics that were once considered hardcore, returning to the demographic that currently feels abandoned by the company that introduced them to videogames.

And it's a trend that could cause an uproar with the HD Crowd simply because they would want the same except with HD graphics, more buttons to use and epic cutscenes all while they ignore it for the next FPS like MAG.

Next, a Game Over to Apple for the iPad. Early this week, Apple was to announce its newest tablet and I was expecting it to crush the DS. But when Steve Jobs confirms its new tablet as the iPad and claimed it had the same structure as the iPod Touch and the iPhone, I cried. I cried because I wanted it to crush the DS. But it gets worse

The iPad, which is larger in size but similar in design to Apple's popular iPhone, was billed by CEO Steve Jobs on Wednesday as "so much more intimate than a laptop and so much more capable than a smart phone."

*skipping info on Steve Jobs*

The iPad has a 9.7-inch touch screen, is a half-inch thick, weighs 1.5 pounds and comes with 16, 32 or 64 gigabytes of flash memory storage. It comes with Wi-Fi and Bluetooth connectivity built in. Jobs said the device has a battery that lasts 10 hours and can sit for a month on standby without needing a charge.

The basic iPad models will cost $499, $599 and $699, depending on the storage size, when it comes out worldwide in March.

So not only will the DS continue unhinged, but so will the Wii. And Maddox will explain why the iPad is a even bigger piece of shit than the iPhone, along with my hair. CURSE YOU APPLE FOR NOT HAVING THE POWER TO CRUSH NINTENDO! Actually, let's add fuel to the fire.

This latest iPad beef isn't about the device's frequently mocked name or any surrounding trademark concerns; rather, it's about the iPad's apparent lack of Flash support. Product demos and statements from Adobe suggest the device is not Flash-friendly -- but Apple's promotional materials paint a very different picture.

And the sad thing is, the Wii is Flash Friendly.

And finally, a 3rd Game Over. This one to Microsoft. Early ago, Microsoft announced a Game Room for their X-Box 360 and Windows PCs. I claimed that this will kill the Wii's Virtual Console, except Microsoft decided to announce this.

Whereas similar platforms - like Nintendo's Virtual Console for the Wii - submit each game to the ratings board individually, Microsoft has had the Game Room itself classified, the virtual arcade given a E10+ rating.

This means Microsoft can release as many games on the service as often as it likes without having to submit them to the ESRB, which should not only speed up the delivery of titles onto the Game Room, but prevent ESRB listings from spoiling the fun in advance, something that happens all too often with Virtual Console titles on the Wii.

There is, of course, a catch, and it has the potential to be a big one for fans of certain titles: the "universal" rating means that no games rated over E10+ will be released onto the Game Room. While this won't affect the majority of the retro titles due to appear on the platform, it will affect a few of the biggest potential releases, like Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat and Metal Slug.

That means games like Street Fighter 2, Mortal Kombat, Narc, Primal Rage, Virtua Fighter, Rampage: World Tour, Total Carnage, and regular Tapper will not touch the Game Room. Something the Wii can get away with. Microsoft, you're making a big mistake on this. You want to crush the Wii's Virtual Console, not have it laugh at you.

And that does it with my disappointing edition of Extra Life/Game Over. Very disappointing indeed. All my hopes and dreams of crushing the Wii have been crushed. Will you excuse me while I down my hopes with Root Beer.

Works Cited: IGN Article: Embracing a Legacy
Yahoo Article on the iPad
PC World: Apple's Ipad and the Flash Clash
Kotaku: No Mature Games allowed in X-Box Game Room

Just when you thought you saw the last of Erik Estavillo

He strikes again. Folks, last year Erik Estavillo went after Sony over being banned from Playstation Network. Then he went after Microsoft over the RROD of the 360(In which he subpoenaed Bill Gates), and Nintendo over the updates. And one of his recent lawsuits is against Activision Blizzard over World of Warcraft.

But now Erik Estavillo, having not been in the spotlight since last month, is back in the limelight in yet another lawsuit. This time, against the gaming press. Sites like GameSpot.com, IGN.com, G4TV.com, GameInformer.com, 1UP.com, Joystiq.com, Kotaku.com, GayGamer.com, QJ.net, SarcasticGamer.com, MMORPG.com, NBC, FOX and DepecheMode.com are named as defendants.

Estavillo's lawsuit against the gaming press is about libel, claiming that many of the articles are full of intendant insults to the plantiff. Ya know, why didn't I think of that? It would take the console wars to a new level where every fanboy sued each other over insults of their favorite systems. Even the Supreme Court would have a headache over that

In addition, QJ.net and SarcasticGamer.com are also named over worker discrimination after they wanted to hire him as an intern(Unpaid writer), only a week later decided not to. DepecheMode is also named after banning him, with him claiming it violates his First Amendment.

Estavillo is seeking $10,000 per article written "ingenuously" against him and $5,000 per message board thread. Not named in the subpoena is GamePolitics and Escapist. Doesn't make sense if they go around poking fun at him, especially when Yahtzee decided to rip this guy a new asshole.

The team at GamePolitics had this to say about him.

I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but one reason I was cautioning you against all these lawsuits is that your credibility has been somewhat compromised, even as your name becomes "famous." I guess it's a trade off of sorts.

Thankfully, he isn't the host of his own show on Fox ala Glenn Beck. Otherwise, we would be seeing tea baggings at Nintendo, Sony, Microsoft, Activision Blizzard and Game Review Sites. Boy I think I have a bad view now.

Works Cited:
GamePolitics

A desperate struggle for the Ultimate All Stars

So it's been a few weeks int 2010. And where are the Wii games? Hello new Wii games. Come out come out wherever you are. I mean the 360 and PS3 already got Bayonetta and Darksiders and the Former is gonna get Mass effect. Is it like there's no game on the Wii that will be good? Come on. You have got to be kiddi..

IGN Review of No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle: 8.8/10

Oh I almost forgot. No More Heroes 2 for the Wii. The sequel to the cult classic of 2008. Ahh the memories of taking a beat katana and slicing up Death Metal like a turkey. Surprised that Jack Thompson didn't go after this game when he was still in the Bar.

But enough about that. Is that the only Wii game you got? Or do you have something up your sleeve. I bet this is the only thing we have for the en...

IGN Review of Tatsunoko vs Capcom: Ultimate All-Stars: 9/10

Are you trying to torture me? I can't buy 2 Wii games in one week. I uhhh, got to save for my new...uhh...toothbrush. Yeah.

So it's true. 2 great Wii games have come out in one week. The first being No More Heroes 2. The other being the spiritual successor to Marvel vs Capcom. Except replace Marvel comic characters with Tatsunoko Anime characters, like Yatterman, Inazuman, Gatchaman, and Tekkaman. Women's rights are gonna have a field day with these guys.

Exclusive to the Ultimate All-Stars edition are 5 new playables with one character removed(Hakushon Daimoh): Yatterman-2(Yatterman's female counterpart), Tekkaman Blade, and Joe the Condor on the Tatsunoko Side, and Frank West(Of Dead Rising) and Zero(Of Mega Man X) on the Capcom side. And of course, many Capcom fans will be crying over a lack of Dante of Devil May Cry. I think the proper title for that should be...Fanboy May Cry.

And so Wii owners finally have something worth while to purchase, all while they have to wait another year before something new comes u...(Notices Super Mario Galaxy 2, Sakura Wars: So Long my Love, Monster Hunter Tri, Red Steel 2, Super Monkey Ball: Step N Roll and Metroid: Other M)...ya know what? I think I'm gonna shut up for a sec.

Works Cited
No More Heroes 2 Review IGN
Tatsunoko vs Capcom Review IGN

Double Trouble: The Brawl Syndrome and Project Needlemouse

Folks, it seems there's outrage going on over the internet, and not because Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li was rated the worst movie of 2009, nor is it Sarah Palin going to work for Fox News(though that would be a major outrage). It's a Sonic situation and that calls for Double Trouble


First off, If you haven't been checking TSSZ lately, it seems a leak within SEGA Europe's SEGA All-Star Racing site caused some information to come out. Reminds me of Capcom's leak on Tatsunoko vs Capcom when it confirmed Tekkaman Blade, Frank West, Joe the Condor and Zero. The data leaked was said to confirm new All-Star moves, new tracks, and the last 4 characters playable in the game.

This has caused an uproar within SEGA Europe and they have issued Legal action against TSSZ. But the last thing we need is the Streisand effect going off.

But it has also caused an uproar among SEGA fans. Those who were wanting to play as Ristar, Nights or Vyse the Blue Rogue are up in arms over the announcement. Reminds me of Smash Bros Brawl fans who wanted Geno in Smash Bros Brawl.

And second off, SEGA this week held a contest on who was in Project Needlemouse. I was hoping the game would star Big the Cat voiced by Star Trek's George Takei. I was wrong. Turns out the main star is none other than Sonic the Hedgehog. CURSE YOU SONIC YOU LARGE HAM!

But as I read on, I agree that Sonic doesn't need these kind of friends. In fact, Sonic doesn't even need Dr Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik ether. Why does Sonic need a fat egg to torment when there are better villains? SEGA, I have suggestions on replacing everyone but Sonic. Replacing Tails, replacing Knuckles, replacing Amy Rose, Shadow the Hedgehog, Dr Robotnik, and replacing Yuji Naka. Ladies and gentlemen, my suggestions for the new replacement Sonic cast are


Peter the Possum


Gregory the Giraffe


Ricardo the Revolting rat


Glenda the face gorging pig


And Tiger Wood. When it comes to women for him, they're GRRRRRReat!

And that does it for Double Trouble. Now will you excuse me. I got a fallout bunker because now I'm in Double Trouble

Works Cited: TSSZNews Links
Link confirming Sonic Solo in Project Needlemouse
Link on leaked information
Link on Legal Threat

Extra Life/Game Over: Wii knock off edition

It's that time once again. And I don't mean Mr T coming out of nowhere to fire off Snickers bars. It's time for the first Extra Life/Game Over of the year.

First off, a Game Over to CyWee Z, a knock off of the Wiimote itself made for the PC. The Controller acts as a 3D Mouse and a controller. Plus one can shift it into a gun-like remote. For more on this, we have a YouTube Clip ready to show



Second, a Game Over to Rockstar. According to a complaint filed by the wives of Rockstar employees, Rockstar's working conditions are poor. The article was found on Gamasutra, but we also have information off of Destructroid on this.

Yet and still, there is more to be said of the working conditions that Rockstar San Diego employees have had to suffer. While managing to endure through the trying times, they still were hit with more blows. Again balance is denied, as working conditions worsened with no appreciation. Working harder, longer, faster, yet there was never a guarantee of a bonus nor if there was any earned, when they will be received! Moreover, bonuses could significantly be reduced based on ANYTHING management comes up with, while the employee would have no way to know about it. Thus bringing to light, the current Rockstar management has grown a thirst for power as it enables itself to grow in the Rockstar's structure. Besides bonuses, financial appreciation has lacked in other aspects as well. For four consecutive years, salary raises have not adjusted properly to cover inflation. This is especially unjust to those who significantly contribute to projects. Further than unappreciative, employees are disrespected when lied to as a whole on how Rockstar games does not generate money and as claims of justification for unappreciated employees are made pointing to the deficit, meanwhile the last Grand Theft Auto game made over a billion dollars of revenue. “Over a billion dollars of revenue”, so where is the recognition and appreciation to those of whom, without them, such success would not have been made?

Ya know, something tells me they forced those hours in just all over one bit of junk in one of the GTA DLC Episodes.

Next up, an extra life to SEGA and Platinum games for Bayonetta. Move over Lara Croft. Good-bye Samus Aran, and sorry your limited edition Metroid Prime Trilogy is being discontinued. Bayonetta is the newest bombshell video game woman to hit the gaming industry.



Bayonetta is out on the X-Box 360 and the PS3 from the creator of Devil May Cry and Viewtiful Joe: Hideki Kamiya and the boys at Platinum games. Many review sites have also praised the game, though the 360 version was praised more than the PS3 version. It's a great game to have, though it's too bad too many 360 and PS3 fans are busy on Modern Warfare 2 to notice this bombshell.

Next up, a Game Over to Sonic the Hedgehog and the guys at Sonic and SEGA All-Star Racing on the Wii. Why? There was word that the Miis would not be playable on the Wii version. Turns out, that was false as the Miis are indeed playable. As if a playable appearance in Wii Sports, Wii Sports Resort, Wii Fit, Mario Kart, Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games and Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Winter Games wasn't enough. Now these little avatars(Not counting those Smurfs in Avatar) can race against the likes of Sonic, Eggman, Ryo, Alex Kidd, and Mii Glenn Beck.

But folks, if you want to show your true patriotism while playing this game, there is only one Mii you must play as.


That's right Ladies and Gentlemen. Mii Colbert. Based on Stephen Colbert of the Colbert Report. He'll prove to the entire SEGA Universe that he is the ultimate patriot when it comes to his All-Star ability of having other Miis lift him up and carry him to the finish line.

And that does it for Extra Life/Game Over. It'll take more than 8 stomps in a row to get this extra life.

Works Cited: Kotaku
Destructoid article
Original letter at Gamasutra
SEGA Nerds

A talk of the Game Boy

Ahh Gameboy. It's been along time since you debut on the market. I still remember how you crushed my dreams by killing the Lynx, Gamegear, TurboExpress, Neo Geo Pocket, Bandai Wonderswan, and Game Park 32. But you're wondering, why am I talking about this system and celebrating it when I'm one year late of celebrating it? Thing is, it's been 20 years since it first released in Europe. So this one is for the European Game Boy players.



Ahh yes. Our old friend the Game Boy. With a creamy spinach color screen, A bulky feeling, and controls similar to the NES, all while boosting an impressive battery life. Developed by the late Gunpei Yokoi, it was considered Nintendo's triumph card into the handheld market.

But it wasn't the new Super MArio Land for Game Boy that got the Game Boy its mark. Oh no. It was a game developed by Russian developer Alexey Pajitnov called Tetris. How dare a game like Tetris shoot the Game Boy into popularity while the Atari Lynx, SEGA Game Gear and TurboExpress all failed due to high price, low battery life, and commercials that made Game Boy players look like red necks and non-Game Boy players look like cool kids.

Throughout the years, the Game Boy had some of the best games for the system. Games like Super Mario Land 2 and 3(Starring Wario), Zelda: Links Awakening, Mega Man: Dr Wily's Revenge, Metroid 2: Return of Samus, Final Fantasy Adventure, and even a new variation of Donkey Kong. But Nintendo wanted to give the handheld some color. The only problem is...it wasn't on its handheld, but rather on the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. The Super Game Boy.



This device hooks your Game Boy title up to the Super NES and lets you play your Game Boy titles on the screen itself. Games like Donkey Kong and Kirby's Dream Land 2 featured pre-set palettes and backgrounds. But the Game Boy was slowly, but surely, falling out. And even its competitors like the Game Gear were following out. Then Nintendo played 2 triumph cards to keep the market alive.

The first was a smaller Game Boy with a crispier screen called the Game Boy Pocket.



The second was a new franchise called Pokemon



The purpose of this game is collecting Pocket Monsters and battling others with your monster. 150 Pokemon divided between 2 games. 8 Gym Leaders, the Elite Four, Team Rocket. Pokemon became the game that revitalize the Game Boy brand. And I'm surprised the members of PETA didn't go after Nintendo for designing this game.

Alas, in 1997, Gunpei Yokoi died on October 4th 1997, killing in a car accident while trying to inspect his and another's car after a crash. The Game Boy legacy would be forever without its grandfather.

Finally, in 1998, the Game Boy finally got its Color makeover. 10 years after its debut, Game Boy evolved from the Pocket to the Game Boy Color



Compared to the original Game Boy, the Game Boy Color was short lived, but it enjoyed a sweet success with all new titles, from an update to Tetris and Zelda: Links Awakening, to Wario Land 3, Shantae, Mega Man Xtreme, and even a Game Boy Color update to the NES classic: Super Mario Bros and even 2 new Zelda games. 2 new ones. I mean seriously, 2 Zelda games? Were we not satisfied with 1 Zelda game? Did we spoil ourselves the wrong way? Oh yeah, Game Boy Color was backwards compatible with the old Game Boy lineup

But the Game Boy lineup was about to get a major upgrade. In 2001, the gaming world was introduced to the SNES-like Game Boy Advance. There were 3 variations of the GBA between 2001 and 2006.



The first variation features an advanced color screen, two shoulder buttons, a much better resolution, and backwards compatibility with Game Boy and Game Boy color games. Games on the lineup included Super Mario Advance(Super Mario Bros 2), Castlevania: Circle of the Moon, Mega Man Battle Network, Mario Kart Super Circuit, F-Zero: Maximum Velocity and Street Fighter II. SEGA even buried the hatchet and released a new Sonic game on the Game Boy Advance called Sonic Advance.

But the Game Boy Advance still had the problems of the Game Boy and Game Boy Color. Despite a sharper screen, there was no light in case one was in the dark. Furthermore, the system still relied on disposable batteries. As a result, Nintendo upped the Game Boy Advance into the SP.



The Game Boy Advance SP upgraded the Game Boy Advance from a Horizontal design to a more Clampshell design. Furthermore, it featured a backlit screen that the player can enable or disable. Finally, to address the battery problem, the GBA SP was the first Nintendo handheld to feature a rechargeable battery pack, eliminating the need to buy new batteries.

But as 2004 came to a close, the Game Boy Advance began its decline. While the Nintendo DS was suppose to be Nintendo's 3rd pillar, the DS would wind up overtaking the GBA as the successor. Adding GBA Backwards compatibility to the DS may have done more harm than good. In a last attempt to keep the Game Boy market alive, Nintendo introduced the GAme Boy Micro in 2005



The portable system was suppose to attract lesser gamers. But unlike the Game Boy Advance and Game Boy Advance SP, the Micro had no backwards compatibility with the Game Boy and Game Boy Color games. With the rising popularity of the Nintendo DS and rival system the Sony Playstation Portable, the Game Boy has died off. And the loss of the GBA Slot for the DSi was the final nail in the coffin for the Game Boy.

The Game Boy is long gone and the DS has taken over the duty of the Game Boy. But we should never forget the legacy of a system which, despite being underpowered compared to its rivals, was able to defy a generation of gamers that game on the go. And it all started with a game by Alexey Pajitnov.(IRonically, Tetris is on the DS if you wanna go check it out)

For more information, 1UP has an article on the Game Boy. You can check it out here

Happy new Year, and all that

Welcome to 2010. If anything, this may be the year that gaming comes out of the dark age and cleanses itself of casual gamers.....or rather the fratcore that continues to buy games like Halo ODST and Modern Warfare 2.

However, it seems Hardcore gaming was on the attack back in October of 2009 when Escapist Magazine member and Zero Punctuation reviewer Yahtzee was hideously attacked by Electronic Arts in a scheme worse than Mirror's Edge

It seemed pretty obvious that the wooden box addressed to Yahtzee had something to do with Dante's Inferno, given that the inside of the lid read "The Fifth Circle of Hell Is Close." Members of The Escapist staff crowded around the box, eager to find out what was inside. We were somewhat bemused to discover nothing but a small burlap bundle containing safety goggles and a ball peen hammer.

Then the music began, and it all became horrifically clear.

"Never Gonna Give You Up..."

What have you done, Electronic Arts? You dare poison Yahtzee with filth sung by Rick Astley? Surely you crossed the line there. But it doesn't end there. Oh no. The troubles continue after the Rickrolling occured.

Strapping on the goggles (he is nothing if not conscientious about safety), he set about smashing the box. He had to break through three layers of wood, bones, and insects, but he finally got to the sound box's guts and yanked out one of the batteries. He also found a small scroll that had been tucked into the musical workings, which read:

The sin of wrath is yours. You have succumbed to anger and opened an infernal spring that seethes with dark waters. Quelled not, your anger begot rage. The waters have risen unchecked and ye will be drowned in stinking mire.

Go to Hell.

There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. Further proof that Electronic Arts is really the devil inside trying to lure poor Yahtzee to the dark side of gaming like New Super Mario Bros Wii, Castle Crashers, Uncharted 2, Halo 3 and a deck of cards. How dare they use a form of humorous advertisement to scare poor, poor Yahtzee. Now will you excuse me, I must write a letter to Yahtzee to give him encouragement to stand up to the evilicious Electronic Arts. Yahtzee, if you're there, please write a video blog and slam Electronic Arts if it makes you feel better, even at the expense of people laughing at you.

Works Cited: Escapist Magazine